Not sure if its just me or having the amounts of work pile up before starting to realize you actually have to do them, then realizing that there's no motivation whatsoever to get anything done in the first place. Anyhow, was reading Edward Monkton's little wisdom books at MPH at Raffles City Shopping Centre the other day. Guess they don't have a lot of the series but there was just this one and it was labeled happiness. For those who don't know who Edward Monkton is, he's this pretty ingenious card designer Giles Andreae (yeah Monkton's just his persona). Basically he just designs these cartoon designs with random interesting thoughts and statements.

Anyhow, I guess its simply because each page means something different in this slapstick funny manner and that's what makes people fork out the money to buy them (well along with the really cute drawings of course). Just came across two pages of the book that I found were extremely meaningful. One was titled 'That Still and Settled Place' while the other was titled "Love and Happiness". Just wanted to share it both so;

That STILL and SETTLED Place
In that STILL and SETTLED place
There's nobody but you
You're where I BREATHE my oxygen
You're where I SEE my view
And when the world feels full of noise
My HEART knows what to do
it finds that STILL and SETTLED place
And DANCES there with YOU.

I guess once again the poem here's pretty self-explanatory. Though we have all those amazing compositions about love – lyrics, poetry where we have a dictionary by our side and still have not a single clue what they're talking about exactly –don't really think this talks really about all the hot-headed passion, but instead the peace of understanding. The tranquility of just being even though you may not know why or what or how. Just like the confusion sometimes that we all face, sooner or later.

I don't know why, but somehow most of the time works, when talking about love or friendship always discuss the idea how everything's always beautiful and amazing while you're able to confide in someone. But the thing is if there is a problem, then pretty mirages the fantasist comes up with will just be classified as delusional in the world of reality. But what hit me hard about the still and settled place is that. We all know we have to face our problems, eventually, to deal with them one way or the other. But its just that sometimes we do need a break. To stop, sit back in that quiet little place that lets us regain our sanity, breathe and recharge before moving on in that continuous battle.

Personally I think most of our hearts don't know what to do. When we get sad, frustrated, angry because there's just too much going on. All the more it gets to me, to hope that someday my heart will know when it needs to find that still and settled place, and to dance there, happy as it can be. Because sometimes we need a break, let go of everything, be wild and free.

Love and Happiness
Let us remember that in this RICH and BEAUTIFUL world there are only two things worth living for – LOVE and HAPPINESS.

The words are just so innocent you wonder why we move along and forget all the simple things like these that make life worth living in the first place. Perhaps its because we derivate, people do heinous crimes, people backstab. Perhaps its because the world isn't as pretty a place as it were with just trees animals and us. Perhaps we all returned to the way things were, decided that fighting was more appealing, that selfish was the way to go. Keep asking myself what exactly is happiness but I never really get the word out, never really understand. Here we are all in the pursuit of happiness, when perhaps we're just never satisfied with what we have? I guess self-satisfaction plays a role in the works of contentment and happiness, but when will we ever be content? How often do we sit down and thank Him for all that we have in our lives instead of grumbling about what we don't have? When do we start appreciating things before they're gone? There're too many questions, but there always are and we can never answer all of them. Maybe all we need to do is just take a step back to the past where we knew the answers straight and simple, and keep it there in our hearts.

Anyhow for those who want to find out more about Edward Monkton, his website and the catalogue if you wish to view more of his designs.

Also, just a call out to all the people out there who actually read this blog; if you're a student who's good at video making/ photoshop/ IT stuff and can commit to a pretty large scale project, please email me at rewindthegun@gmail.com. So that's all for now, while I go back to pretending to study biology.

Labels: Books, Thoughts

Photo spamming once again for the sake of reminding myself to sustain this blog.



Went for IMCB from Tues-Thurs for Microbial Quorum Sensing. Was a pretty interesting experience albeit us slacking most of the time. Giving a brief overview for those who do care, microbial quorum's basically the study of quorum sensing mechanisms and bacterial signally that synchronize a certain gene expression. They coordinate a range of important biological functions, in particular, virulence and biofilm formation. So basically we did alot of experiments on agarose gels to identify the specific bacterial pathogens and test for their prescence after culturing them.



Our agarose gels and stuff. The attachment was quite cool in that sense that is develops the possibility of applying cell signalling into quorum quenching to degenerate and weaken the biofilm layers on top of using antibiotics to control infectious diseases which would result in a much higher efficiency.



Picture with my funky lab partner Helena from SCGS. :D We pwn! And of course the other pictures with Celest Valerie Deborah Shijie so yes. Not used to photo spamming photos of myself anymore for some queer reason so all the same. Somehow don't feel like going back to school after all these (sounds painful with the mere mention of it) but yeah. Sadly, life goes on.

Labels: Events, Photos, Studies

Just wanted to post something on To Write Love On Her Arms (TWLOHA for short). For those that don't know about this project, its a non profit organization in America which aims to present hope and find help for young people struggling with problems such as depression, drug addiction, self-injury, and suicide. The project began in Orlando, Florida in February 2006 as a written story by Jamie Tworkowski, the true story of five days spent with a friend who was denied entry into a drug treatment center. The story was a look at those five days, and t-shirts were printed and sold initially as a way to pay for the friend's treatment.

"People need to know that they are not alone. It’s estimated that 2 out of 3 people that deal with depression walk through it alone and they don’t get help. It points to confusion, the shame and the stigma that’s associated with these things. It’s estimated that 19 million people in America alone struggle with depression. That just screams that people are alone and yet they feel alone because these are things people don’t talk about." Took this out from the interview on the founder of TWLOHA.

Was just thinking about what she said and its true that most people face depression alone because when we're depressed, we tend to think we're alone even though we may not be. And just because this issue can be related to everyone (or practically so), it just makes the matter so close to the heart. TWLOHA, by bringing out the effects if treatment or facing depression isn't properly handled, just shows us the pressing need for us to do something, anything on the matter. After reading the interview, you realise its not just statistics on a piece of paper, its real and its happening, and it will continue happening if we don't help. I don't know how much any of y'all can associate yourselves to it but I think its a cause really worth spreading.

I don't think all the concerts or buying shirts is actually the main issue, but instead on what you are doing. Just consider perhaps whether you have dissed someone off as "emo" before moving on with your life. Is there any person that's there who needs your help that you're ignoring? I think alot of us tend to view things on the surface, see the effects yet ignore the cause. Perhaps that's the way we're brought up to believe that problems come to us and we deal with it or die. But its not true, because there'll always be someone out there who's willing to listen. That someone's there, just waiting for you to let him/her in.

And for those who're wondering about the above picture: During the time of the year when suicide rates are at their peak, 13th of Feb's the official TWOLHA date, the day before V Day, to start showing people how much they are loved. The beauty in the event's that there's no set time or location. Just you, where you are and when you're there to speak what you truly believe in.

Took this from the website: "We will physically write the word LOVE on our arms (with a sharpie, or whatever other ink suits you best). If someone asks you what it’s for, tell them about TWLOHA. Tell them they are loved, that they are important. And ask if you can write LOVE on their arm as a symbol of that. Don't be afraid to reach out to those who need love, those who you often walk right by every day. They need our care."



Another photo I saw that just hit me really hard. You can go to the Facebook Event to see the photos and be amazed at the amount of people supporting the cause. I guess 13th Feb's over this year but even if this movement simmers down through the years, the issue'll still remain. And so will the need to write love on your/her arms.

I think most of us may choose to share the love of God, but sharing whatever love is strongest to you is what matters. Boils down to the simple fact that depression has no boundaries, but neither does our love.



There's really alot more amazing stuff including the videos and more detailed info on the My Space and Facebook site for TWLOHA so if you have the time please do go there and read about it. Love is the movement, so help stop the bleeding.

Labels: Causes, Thoughts

If you were wondering what PS stands for; its Photo Spamming. In a rush for time so here goes, for your viewing pleasure (though the photos are taken by a pathetic 1.3MP phone after my Nokia N73 crashed on me)



SSEF poster boards. It was kindof supposed to look abstract (no pun intended) but its hard without any effects and a lousy phone.



The amusing poster with an edit in a name. :D



Finally the prize which neither May nor I was expecting, to say the least. Pretty much a worthwhile experience even if we didn't win anything so. RGS won 3 Merits 2 Bronze 1 Silver and 1 Gold so congrats all the same to all 13 funky SMP groups/ individuals who took part.

Labels: Events, Photos, Projects

Went for the SSEF (Singapore Science and Engineering Fair 08) judging today at the Singapore Science Centre. Met a judge that really changed my perspective on things. Will post some of the main points I gained from that 20 minutes of conversation through the post so here goes.

Knowing very well that only 13 projects were chosen for SSEF from RGS, most of us wanted to be fully prepared for the judges questions that came ahead, hence almost all the groups frantically prepared scripts to rehearse so that we wouldn't freak out when asked a question. (And for your understanding, May and my project was on foot insoles)

After observing our poster for quite some time, our second judge stood about a few metres away from our exhibition board just looking at our poster from the side of his eye (after which he said he was observing us from afar). But anyhow, the second thing this judge told us was "I don't want to listen to what you have on your cards, so put them away. I want you to speak from your heart. I want to know what your project is about, why, and how." Both of us just blinked at him for a second before realising what his request was.

1. In Confidence
Started rambling off initially, but after a while we realised we learnt so much more by not looking at the script we prepared. Just got me to realise that sometimes its not so much the things you're prepared for in life that makes you confident. Its the preparation for the unprepared that makes you confident, because that will come from the heart. Even in debates, we can make convincing deliveries of speeches about ecoterrorism and the UN, but strip away those sheets of paper. Are we able to actually understand the purpose of the debate and empathize with the point of contention in the status quo or are we simply just listing the points of the argument off the internet simply because the issue is imposed on us to be discussed?

I swear it was hard prying ourselves away from the cue cards, but eventually we did talk. We talked alot more, not just simply the basic facts that was already written in our report, but more of what we've learnt from the project, what we actually feel. And what we learnt in not knowing what you want to say to just say what you know, I think that made all the difference.

2. In Understanding
The first thing he asked after May talked alot about our project on the "What" aspect was "You could have summed this all up in one sentence." And we were pretty much discombobulated trying to fervishly assert it was explaining our stand. But eventually we did realise - he was right. Moving on and talking about how the project can be implemented towards a wider audience, he asked us "so how do you think this can be applied to the society." Our immediate response was "The sports industry. Dancers." All he did was smile before asking us to think harder. How our project can be implemented in places where it does matter. Where it would actually make a difference in society. After talking about another whole list yet not getting there, he eventually talked to us about companies researching in insoles and how this can impact occupations such as soldiers in the army and the police.

I guess this doesn't relate to much people, and even you might be thinking "its just a simply insole, why think so big?" But its precisely why we're thinking things small. It's a grave enough mistake when as students, we think every research studies project we do can only play its part by "raising awareness to the community", and that's all there is to it. But not realising, not understanding what you can actually do with your knowledge - that's the worse mistake one could possibly make.

Also, we talked about careers where he told us "never base your job on the amount of money you want to earn, you'll be doomed for disaster." And I think its just also because we tend to focus on fulfilling the essentialities of surviving that we forget the essentialities of being. Life gives us the option of driving ourselves forward like a motor without once stopping to understand and yet go on living. But in that sense, we're living for the sake of the roof on our head, living for the sake of living but not being truly alive.

I can't remember the exact words or how he put it, but it went along these lines: "If there's only one message you bring back, remember this: Don't worry about the money. Do what you truly wish to do and the money will come to you because richness comes from every person you truly impact and every life you make a difference in." And I think its because in understanding what you want, and doing it that eventually will make your life worth living. Don't think I'll forget those words in a really long time.

3. In Belief
So after discussing careers, he asked us what we aspired to be, or whether we've thought about what we want to be in the future. The conversation went like this:

Judge: So what do you want to be in the future?
Me: I've always wanted to be a doctor.
Judge: Do you want to become a doctor because other people are telling you to, or does it come from your heart?
Me: It comes from my heart.
Judge: Then go for it.

I didn't even realise how convicted I sounded when I replied "it comes from my heart". It was just like that, no thinking, just a reply straight off. Well I can't say that I'm entirely confident I'm smart enough to get into med school in the near future of 3 years, but I think its the belief that'll really drive anyone to do anything they want to.

Even thinking about it now, how he carried out the judging. I must say it was very different from what our other two judges did. The other two judges were very nice and did things the procedural way, presentation, questions and we're done. But this judge, he believed that by not letting us look at the script, by having the judging as if it were a conversation, by questioning us to make us think further to develop a wider understanding of our project, we would benefit more. I think he believed that by doing the judging this way, he would be able to teach us so much more, and not just presentation styles. And you know what? He believed it right.

Perhaps its because after all it is a science competition and we thought we'd end up with scary professors scrutinizing our work, but today proved us wrong. After reading this, you might think that its just a simple science experiment. But I definitely learnt from the judging today that what you stand to gain from scientic experiments can be more than just scientic jargon. So much more.

And on behalf of May and I (though you too probably won't read this), I just want to say thank you to Dr. John Heng Kok Hui for the judging today. If there's only one thing I took away from today, it is this.

Labels: Events, Projects, Studies

So obviously I'm procrasinating yet again. After the last episode of Heroes Season 2 I have found myself being unabashedly despondent and bored over the matters of reality. Like the desperate amount of homework piling up. Being not quite the perfectionist yet very OCD, my towers of unfiled paper have grown to about 5cm thick (of which in a sudden OCD complex I will file all of them up, I swear.)

SSEF and JGs this week and another chinese SA up to go before its the holidays. The notion's utterly disturbing, even. Pretty much redundant rantings before I go off so. Here's to slacking your head off during exam week.

Posting this email that Samuel sent me which I thought was worth reading if you're free to do so:

Science and God

'Let me explain the problem science has with Jesus Christ.' The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand.

'You're a Christian, aren't you, son?'

'Yes sir,' the student says.

'So you believe in God?'

'Absolutely.'

'Is God good?'

'Sure! God's good.'

'Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?'

'Yes.'

'Are you good or evil?'

'The Bible says I'm evil.'

The professor grins knowingly. 'Aha! The Bible!' He considers for a moment.

'Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help him? Would you try?'

'Yes sir, I would.'

'So you're good.....!'

'I wouldn't say that.'

'But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person if you could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't.'

The student does not answer, so the professor continues. 'He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer, even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Can you answer that one?'

The student remains silent.

'No, you can't, can you?' the professor says. He takes a sip of water from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.

'Let's start again, young fella Is God good?

''Er...yes,' the student says.

'Is Satan good?'

The student doesn't hesitate on this one. 'No.'

'Then where does Satan come from?'

'The student : 'From...God...''

'That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?'

'Yes, sir.'

'Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything,correct?'

'Yes.'

'So who created evil?' The professor continued, 'If God created everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according to the principle that our works define who we are, then God is evil.'

Without allowing the student to answer, the professor continues:'Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things, do they exist in this world?

'The student: 'Yes.'

'So who created them?'

The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats his question. 'Who created them? There is still no answer. Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace in front of the classroom. The class is mesmerized.

'Tell me,' he continues onto another student. 'Do you believe in Jesus Christ, son?'

The student's voice is confident: 'Yes, professor, I do.'

The old man stops pacing. 'Science says you have five senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seen Jesus?'

'No sir. I've never seen Him'

'Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?'

'No, sir, I have not.'

'Have you ever actually felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelt your Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of Jesus Christ, or God for that matter?'

'No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't.'

'Yet you still believe in him?'

'Yes.'

'According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that,son?'

'Nothing,' the student replies. 'I only have my faith.'

'Yes, faith,' the professor repeats. 'And that is the problem science has with God. There is no evidence, only faith.'The student stands quietly for a moment, before asking a question of his own. 'Professor, is there such thing as heat?'

'Yes,' the professor replies. 'There's heat.'

'And is there such a thing as cold?'

'Yes, son, there's cold too.'

'No sir, there isn't...'

The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested. The room suddenly becomes very quiet. The student begins to explain.

'You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat, mega-heat, unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but we don't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit up to 458 degrees below zero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold; otherwise we would be able to go colder than the lowest -458 degrees. Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence of heat.You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.'

Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom, sounding like a hammer.

'What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing as darkness?'

'Yes,' the professor replies without hesitation. 'What is night if it isn't darkness?'

'You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light, but if you have no light constantly you have Nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use to define the word. In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?'

The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him. This will be a good semester. 'So what point are you making, young man?'

'Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with, and so your conclusion must also be flawed.'

The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time. 'Flawed? Can you explain how?'

'You are working on the premise of duality,' the student explains. 'You argue that there is life and then there's death; a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it.'

'Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?'

'If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young man, yes, of course I do'

'Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?'

The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as he realizes where the argument is going. A very good semester, indeed.

'Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a preacher?'

The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the Commotion has subsided.

The student looks around the room... 'Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the professor's brain?' The class breaks out into laughter.

'Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain,felt the professor's brain, touched or smelled the professor's brain? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, with all due respect, sir. So if science says you have no brain, how can we trust your lectures, sir?'

Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at the student, his face unreadable.

Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. 'I guess you'll have to take them on faith.

''Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists with life,' the student continues. 'Now, sir, is there such a thing as evil?'

'To continue the point you were making earlier to the other student, let me give you an example of what I mean.'

Now uncertain, the professor responds, 'Of course, there is. We see it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man...It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world.These manifestations are nothing else but evil.'

To this the student replied, 'Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God.

God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light.'

The professor sat down.

Labels: Ramblings